Family adjustments to serious illnesses

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News every doctor hates to deliver. Words every patient hates to hear. Yet here you are dealing with the devastation of these life changing words.

These words may have come as a complete shock; or perhaps, if truth be told, you already had an inkling: why else would that previously unseen furrow be firmly lodged on the consultant’s eyebrow? Why else would the room be full of specialists you’ve never previously met? And why did they insist that you come into hospital rather than talk about your results over the phone? This serious illness that you feared the most- cancer, dementia, HIV- has landed on your doorstep and you just do not know what to do next.

You might be a couple wondering how your relationship will be affected by your new diagnosis. Or parents worrying about how your child’s disability is affecting their siblings. Or perhaps you are a family reeling from the news that dad’s cancer treatment is no longer working, and you would like some help with talking openly about his impending death. Let me begin by saying how sorry I am that you are going through this.

There are practical things to be discussed- day-to-day care, treatment wishes, end of life plans- as well as emotions to be processed- anger, grief, fear, worry. Whether you need long term sessions to process the effect of the illness on yourself or your family, or you need a small number of sessions to get the communication about your wishes and hopes going, we are here to help. We might work together as a whole family unit, or you might choose to have your own space as an individual, couple, or sibling group. I don’t just come with professional experience on this subject- I have walked through this fire personally, and therefore would love to journey with you at whatever stage you find yourselves. No emotion is too big, no thought too taboo; I am here to create an open, non-judgmental space that will help draw your family together.